Rereading the books also makes me wish I was a wizard. There are some people I'd love to cast a couple of Unforgivable Curses on. Or maybe not the Unforgivables, since I don't want to go to Azkaban... but I can think of a couple of other uncomfortable ones.
Its Summer in Alabama-been in the 90s here lately, which means work is the sub-Arctic and home isn't much better. Jason gets too hot too quick, and then starts to feel sick, Bless him, so we keep it cool. But then I freeze. I actually have to take clothes OFF to go outside. I wish Sebastian would get used to Play Water again-he loved it last year. Not this year.
This will be a short work week because of the Memorial Day holiday yesterday. Next week is normal, then the following week we have Counselor Camp. The week after that, we go on "vacation", and the week after that is the last week of June. This month is also going to sail by like its something to do. Then I'm going to blink and it will be Alex's first day of Kindergarten, Lizzie's first day of Middle School, Mimi's first day of High School... yikes! Then it will be Christmas and time to start the whole bloody process all over again.
Pray for us when we go to CT, that court goes well. That it isn't too much of a hassle. I'm not going to say more than that, because I recently asked Mimi if she thought I was too negative about her mother and she said yes! I was a little befuttled, considering some of the things she used to say. I told her was that I didn't want my reasons (what I felt were sound reasons) to come off as excuses to her, so all I was saying at that moment was that there is stuff she doesn't know yet and that I don't do anything unprovoked. And I left it at that. I hope that was the right answer.
Jason is looking forward to sitting down with her and having a talk when the girls come down. A real talk. It should be a good night.
We have actually been getting a good bit done lately. Cleaned the kitchen, did a mess of dishes, cleaned the bathroom, cleaned ALEX'S ROOM (the girls' room)... What a project that was! It took me three days to get it to the point of her being able to get back in there. But the toys are organized, her clothes are all in her closet (still need to organize), her books are in the shelves (still need to organize); but its definitely coming alone.
I am not going to dwell on it, but money sucks. Makes the world go 'round, to be sure; but also is undeniably the root of all evil. I'm tired of trying to figure out how to make a car payment, keep the lights on and feed the kids all in the same month. I'm also tired of being financially responsible. I know we need to be, because we need to get our credit scores back up, but I'm SO sick of it. I'm tired of having to budget every bill, to drive for a day with the gas light on. I'd really like to be able to just pay a bill when it comes in, to put gas in the truck when it gets low. The worst part of it is having to tell the kids no when they ask for a toy or to go to McDonalds. Makes me feel like a lousy parent.
Along those lines, I'm struggling with getting a cat sitter for the time we are on vacation. To get one or not? I think that if we buy a big bag of cat food, open it up and then get some of those dispenser-water bottles for them, they'll be okay. They'll be fine without their litter getting changed, too; albeit the house will be a bit smelly when we get back, but that's okay. I think I'd rather spend the money in the short run and get the water things (maybe it will keep them from spilling everywhere every-flippin-time) then spend God-knows-what on a pet sitter.
Its getting on to bedtime for the kids and maybe Jason & I are then going to watch "Harry Potter and the Prisioner of Azkaban". It is one of my favorite movies because I like Lupin. I like the boggart and the "riddikulus". Makes me wonder what a boggart would turn into for me.
Jason is working on his resume right now. We had a discussion last night about resumes and getting better jobs and things of that nature. We have decided that we are going to expand our horizons outside of the state of Alabama. I don't
I hate to say that it no longer matters where we live... but its the truth. We can live in Alabama, Arizona, California... it doesn't really matter anymore. Visitation here is visitation there is visitation anywhere. Mimi has said that she is "fine" where she is and doesn't know what she wants, I think. I don't remember her exact verbage but that was the gist. I am trying very hard not to "put words in her mouth" as she has accused me of doing.
Truth be told, we haven't asked Lizzie where she wants to live. We always assumed that Mimi was the one that wanted to live with us, as she has been (for the last 8 years) the most vocal about it. Lizzie has only here recently started saying she wants to be with us. So I don't know, we should ask her. I quite heartily apologize for the fact that I didn't think of that sooner. Bad me.
I do know, however, that it will be hard to get Lizzie without Mimi, harder than getting Mimi without Lizzie. I think that them being separated for a period of time probably wouldn't be bad for either of them. Maybe Mimi would get out some of her aggression in a healthy way; and Lizzie, I think, is a different person all underneath who we "see". I wonder what she is like without Mimi's shadow. We might get to find out this summer, as Mimi apparently has "required" band camp. That being the case, we are going to try and keep Lizzie down here with us while Mimi goes back for band camp.
I also definitely, definitely know, that no matter what, I have loved and treated those girls as my own since they were small, and that aint gonna change. Ever. <3 Mimi <3 Lizzie <3
I think I'm done... I started this yesterday and I think I have hit every point I meant to. I have a migraine today so I'm not thinking clearly. I have to go pack up the kids-they're spending the next two nights with Jacquie, and unfortunately getting subjected to "Bible school". Ugh.
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